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“Tops”, Aylesbury: burglar or banker?

“Tops Security Solutions” burglar alarm, Aylesbury • Peer closely at this and you’ll see a frowning, potato-faced fellow in an eye mask and stripey t-shirt positively pelting along beneath the logo....

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“Bell Intruder Alarms”, Great Missenden: squished

“Bell Intruder Alarms” burglar alarm, Great Missenden • A prime example of that popular burglar alarm trope the “awkward diagonal logo”, generally prompted by vertical boxes too narrow for a lengthy...

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“Bell Intruder Alarms”, Aylesbury: Quasimodo

“Bell Intruder Alarms” burglar alarm, Aylesbury • This is presumably an updated version of yesterday’s design, now divested of its awkward diagonal logo, though the clip-art church bell remains. In...

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“Strident Bell”, Marlow: found art object

“Strident Bell” burglar alarm, Marlow • My final bell-themed alarm for now is the superbly-named vintage device which starred as centrepiece of my recent post on red alarms. I’ve got no idea how old it...

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“Town & Country”, Great Missenden: leafy glade

“Town & Country” burglar alarm, Great Missenden • A natural niche rather than an architectural one, this swathe of leaves is protecting an aptly-named Town & Country alarm (which has an...

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“Lockrite Security”, Aylesbury: 1970s mom

“Lockrite Security” burglar alarm, Aylesbury • This was found in Aylesbury, which seemed to me a shabby, sullen and faintly menacing place, despite being the county town of posh Berkshire. A brief...

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“Blue Circle”, Great Missenden: fox-cat-category

“Blue Circle” burglar alarm, Great Missenden • I really can’t tell if this is a fox or a cat. Its pointy ears suggest the former, its posture the latter. However, since I already have a load of...

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“Raptor Security”, Aylesbury: stabby talon

“Raptor Security” burglar alarm, Aylesbury • I get the feeling I’m missing something here. What on earth is this nasty thing meant to be – a tusk, a fin, a hook? Given the name, it’s probably a talon,...

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“Grange”, Old Amersham: monkish manor

“Grange” burglar alarm, Old Amersham • Home, home on the grange – a popular place name in England, and originally denoting the farming estate of a monastery, of which there were once squillions. Henry...

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“Summa”, Aylesbury: theological treatise

“Summa” burglar alarm, Aylesbury • There’s a learned Christian reference here, possibly unintentional: the Summa Theologica, aka the Summa, was a major religious tract by 13th-century philosopher...

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“Ambassador”, West Wycombe: stray Secom plug

“Ambassador” burglar alarm, West Wycombe • See how the shapes are moving on? Yesterday’s was a slightly squared-off triangle, and now we’re motoring towards full-on faceted sounders by way of a few...

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“MicroTec Security”, Milton Keynes: fancy-edged

“MicroTec Security” burglar alarm, Milton Keynes • Like yesterday’s pointy-sided MicroTec, this newer box is a rarely-sighted fancy-edged shape – indeed the only example I’ve seen. It’s duller and...

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“Micromark”, Great Missenden: 1960s sci-fi

“Micromark Security Systems” burglar alarm, Great Missenden • I’ve already featured Micromark in the retrofuturism section, and I now know they’re a defunct DIY option – but I still like their unusual...

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“Oakpark Alarms”, Aylesbury: long-lived oak

“Oakpark Alarms” burglar alarm, Aylesbury • Another long-lived oak, Winslow-based Oakpark Alarms was founded in 1985. Although their website still wishes visitors a happy christmas 2010, one of the...

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“Fortress Alarms”, Aylesbury: missing portcullis

“Fortress Alarms” burglar alarm, Aylesbury • Even though the portcullis appears to have fallen off, and the fortress seems to be actively inviting burglars in, I liked this one so much I used it in my...

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“Assegai Security Solutions”, Aylesbury: exotic

“Assegai Security Solutions” burglar alarm, Aylesbury • Today’s weapon is the exotic assegai, a light iron-tipped throwing spear mainly used in South Africa. The company behind it are rather more...

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“Global Tec”, Milton Keynes: spinny

“Global Tec Security Systems” burglar alarm, Milton Keynes • Quite a brushy, 1990s-looking “spinny” globe logo here – which despite focusing on the continent of America, was found in the moneyed home...

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“Camguard”, Aylesbury: Granta

“Camguard” burglar alarm, Aylesbury • This C in a sea claims to be guarding the River Cam, which as its name suggests runs through Cambridge, where it’s also known as the Granta. The sounder however...

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“Town & Country”, Great Missenden: cop clamp

“Town & Country” burglar alarm, Great Missenden • This is brilliant – a T and C made out of a clamp, looking like the opening titles for a 1970s cop show. Perhaps not strictly a monogram as it’s...

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“24-7″, Great Missenden: sleepy

“24-7″ burglar alarm, Great Missenden • Phew! A sounder that operates 24 hours a day as opposed to, say, just school hours. Unless this means 24 minus 7, which is 17 hours operation a day, allowing...

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